The Luckiest No Matter What!

CO-WORKERS: December 7th, 2012 (16 Weeks, 4 Days) I have to say, and will continue to say, that I keep this big secret not because I don't trust people, not because I don't want people that I care about to know, but because of my own issues in my own head.  My own crippling fear.  With that being said... I was "out" to my family and now it was December 7th, my work Christmas Party and this was a deadline I had signed about when to "out" myself at work about the pregnancy. I decided the best way to do this was to wear a tight shirt so that my little babies bump could tell the news for me.  Then maybe people would just start seeing it and just make their own conclusions and I would never have to say a thing...sounds great! So...Josh and I get to the party and I make him drive around the block at least three times before I have the courage to go in.  We park, get out, and enter greeting everyone. My coat is still on at this point.  Josh asks me,...

December 28th, 2012: 19 weeks, 4 days The day if FINALLY here!  We made it to our 20 week appointment, the big ultrasound!  The babies were amazing!!!!!!!!!  They were moving and huge and unlike anything we have ever seen.  BABY A STATS: In the 62 percentile, 160 heartbeat Baby A: Profile Baby A: Profile Baby A's Hand covering its face :)  Please stop taking pictures of me!  BABY B STATS: In the 60th percentile, 155 heartbeat Baby B: Profile Baby B: Profile Baby B's Feet: They were crossed facing the top of my belly :)  ME: 20 Weeks!!!!!!! Josh: 20 Weeks and Sick :( Big Milestone!  So thankful! Keep hoping...Keep praying...

December 26th: 19 weeks, 2 days Today is the anniversary of Josh and my first date which took place December 26th, 2000.  On that night, Josh came over, we sledded in my cul-da-sac on huge hill of snow, and watched In the Army Now .  We also had our first kiss.  12 years later, on that same day, while watching TV, I thought I felt a kick on the outside in the lower left part of my stomach while Josh was at work.  I have never felt something like that and was so hopeful that was really what I was feeling, but tried not to get my hopes up.  Later that night, after saying our nightly prayers, I asked the babies, "Did you really kick me today?"  I swear I felt a little wack to the left of my belly button.  Josh felt it too!  Could it be?  That little reassure I've been getting on the inside that things are okay with the babies could be happening on the outside?!  My heart could not have swelled any bigger.  The fact that...

December 25th: 19 Weeks Josh and I have a Christmas journal that we write in every year.  It was something we found at Bronner's.  There are questions in there about what family gatherings took place, what food was served, what gifts were exchanged.  We always put a picture in there too each year of our tree and gifts.  I leafed through the past couple of years and although there was a lot of joy and A LOT to be thankful for, last year's journal carried with it a lot of sadness.  We wrote about the baby we had lost and the fact that it was our first Christmas without my brother.  We wrote about our desire to be parents and our hopelessness about ever getting there.  It was honest, but not exactly a typical journal about Christmas.  This year's Christmas was special.  While I did not want any gifts for the babies (still way too far away from them getting here for something crazy like that).  I did ask my family for maternity ...