Sunday, May 14, 2017

Giving Yourself Permission

Today is Mother's Day...

Josh let me know, early in the weekend, that I was "off duty" on Mother's Day.  That meant I could spend time as I chose without feeling like there were things I had to do.  Josh was going to do the diapers, do the bedtime, do the cooking.  Yes, I will keep him :)

While the boys were napping, Josh asked me how I was going to spend that time.  I am usually extremely productive during naptime.  It is basically one of the few chances I have to get things done and it is also literally the only time I have to myself.  When choosing whether to spend time with myself or being productive, I basically always choose being productive.  I often grade papers or work on school work, do laundry, fold laundry, put clothes away and lots of other work-type stuff.

Today, I was mulling how to spend my time.  I was pretty sure I was NOT going to be productive- I was going to do something just for me.  I thought about watching TV, reading, writing, and taking a nap.  With that, came the guilt.  Our house was messy, there was laundry to fold, the cars could use a wash and vacuum, and yard-work?! Don't even get me started.  How can I justify taking time to nap or watch TV when that list is so long and so vast and feels so necessary?

Parents, you feel me?! The struggle is real.  We are overworked under-rested.  Both moms and dads give and give and give, work and work and work.  We wouldn't change it, are happy to do it, but that doesn't mean it's easy and that doesn't mean we aren't freaking tired. 

Today, I gave myself permission to rest. 

I went upstairs, turned on an episode of "The Real Housewives of New York City" and was out cold in about fifteen minutes.  The nap I took was incredible.  I woke up and it was dinner time.  

The laundry and cars and the messy house and the God-forsaken yardwork (can you tell yardwork is a total #trigger for me right now?!) were still there, but so was a smile on my face.  

I know people always say that in order to be a good mom or a good parent, you HAVE to take care of yourself.  That is SO easier said than done.  But today, for a little bit, I lived that and it was great.  I pushed the guilt down as far as it would go and gave myself the permission for some peace, some quiet, and some rest.

Moms, parents, grandparents, anyone who puts themselves behind the children they love, support, and take care of, please give yourself permission to rest in whatever way feels good to you.  Let that rest be guilt-free.  Don't make excuses for it and don't feel like you have to justify it to yourself or anyone else.  YOU DESERVE IT!  You are raising tiny global citizens!

Schedule it if that helps make it happen.  Put it on the calendar if that it helps having something to look forward to.  Use it as a reward for accomplishing a DIY project you've been wanting to tackle or after putting together a new bike or cleaning out a closet.  Make time for you... just you

Rest! 

It sure can feel like the "holy grail," but that's exactly what makes it so necessary.

Give...Yourself...Permission...    

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